All parties have only one manifesto – Vote for me! But there are some subliminal messages which keep coming through:

Congress – Defeat Modi. Also we are secular, we empowered women and we brought RTI.

BJP – Vote Modi (LK Advani has a different manifesto as do Murli Manohar Joshi, Sushma Swaraj, Navjot Singh Sidhu, Uma Bharti….. but we dont need to go into that)

BSP – We dont care who is the largest party but just get us enough seats so that we can bargain with them for (y)our benefit. This manifesto can be anyone else’s also- SP, JP, Biju Janata Dal, TMC, ADMK, DMK,TDP, TRS, SAD, MNS, etc.

ADMK – Vote for Amma.

DMK – Dont vote Amma (pleeeeeeeaaaaaasssse!!!!!) This is Thatha’s last election so sob, sob! Also Amma responsible for Kaveri water crisis, power crisis and all other crisis. When we were in power we hid them all from you.

TMC – Only thosh who bhote phor didi are shekoolar and not maoisht

Left – We dont know. Our rout(e) will be clear after May 16th. Oh what a pity matchmaker Harkishen Singh Surjeet is dead.

AAP – Dont vote Ambani, Adani