Apropos (as they say in letter to the editor) to the recent dancing around of the crew in an airline to celebrate Holi- I am not complaining. Being inside an aircraft when it is on air is still one of the less pleasant experiences of life. My terror mounts when there are air pockets. And as for flying times, I generally prefer the day to the night, at least I can see where the flight is headed. Given recent happenings in the airline industry, my discomfort only multiplies manifold. I have a fixed set of prayers I say every time I board a flight. And each time I land I feel like Pope John Paul II, wanting to kiss the ground of the country/city where I land.

That aside, I am all for in-house entertainment though not of the type that Ram Rao Adik once demanded. Remember him? After his behaviour on a flight he was branded Rum Row Addict.

Now that a Holi dance will become de rigueur on flights, here are some more festivals/events that may interest airlines.

January – Mattu Pongal with Jalli Kattu between the aisles

February – Valentines Day – recorded speeches of Bal Thackeray will be played.

March – Holi/Rama Navami Bhajanai with panakam, neer more.

April – Good Friday with a makeshift altar and prayers (for five years, after which Tamil New Years day will take over for the next five years)

May – Akshaya Trithiyai – giving away of hand fans, slippers and curd rice to the passengers

June – Rath Yatra – we can drag a chariot between the aisles with Hare Rama Hare Krishan group in front. Turnaround in cockpit and tail.

July – Adi Perukku – giving mixed rice in packets to all passengers. Koozhu padaithal by crew boiling the gruel in wood fired stoves and offering to Mariyamman. Dance with LR Easwari devotionals.

August – plenty of events – Uriyadi for Gokulashtami, followed by Ganpati Bappa Morya for Vinayaka Chaturthi. Special attraction – immersion of deities from the aircraft

September – Garba dance down the aisles, as also Kummi for Navaratri

October – Dipavali – free distribution of new clothes, oil and sheeka packets and then bursting of crackers on air. Lehyam for those who feel sick. Also Soorasamharam in Tamilnadu bound flights with KBS/Ramani Ammal/Soolamangalam Sisters music.

November – Lighting of lamps all along aircraft for Karthikai deepam. In house music only Om Namasivaya by SPB.

December – Margazhi Masa Bhajanai. Sabha on air can also be an option.